Category: Journal
Year Note 2025
This is the first Year Note that I ever write, and I think a good place to start is a bit of context. It had been the previous year when I had decided to study counselling and work towards a career change. At that time, my marketing career was in the ruins after a couple…
Goodbye rye, farewell bakewell, ciao bao
It turns out I am celiac. And I find out at 42. I have spent a long time not feeling quite right. Fatigued, bloated. Many of the signs were there and I just wonder how far back they go. It’s bittersweet. A sweet chance to heal and get more energy. Letting go of the idea…
On starting Uni and all the changes
in JournalThis is a journal entry, dealing with my own experiences, feelings and thoughts. Click here for psychotherapy theory, or here to find more about me. It’s been a long time I don’t publicly journal. The upside is that I have been quite committed to my private journal where I don’t have to think twice about what I…
Pain and me
in JournalI live with pain. Pain rules my life as a kind dictator. It limits what I can do and how much I enjoy things. But it also makes me reflect on my lifestyle and builds my resilience to loss. There are many things I do to manage my pain – never in the hope it…
Life is a gift, and then we die
in JournalI was walking up the stairs when I started hearing my child scream. Initially, I thought it was a cat in agony. But as I walked through the door I saw her, turning around in the floor contorting with the pain while my ex negotiates with an ambulance. I grabbed my child while I waited…
Climbing someone else’s success stairs
in JournalI have been doing lots of things in the last six months since I moved back in Brighton. I decided to become a counsellor and started my studies. I decided to learn design properly and have been building a portfolio with design work in mental health. I have been working enough (in marketing) to make…
My interview with UEL and being a weed
in JournalI have been busy the last six months. Training to become a counsellor, learning design, making money, thinking how to make more, being a parent, looking after myself and continuing my path of self-development. It’s been a good busy. Part of the hard work has been about getting myself in a position where I can…
The burden of having to be amazing
in JournalI have a big burden – I have to be amazing. This sucks, because I am not amazing. Certainly not most of the time. Who the f**** is? I grew up as a gifted child – diagnosed at 6 – in a narcissistic family. Imagine that. I don’t think it was very different for my…
Getting to know silence
in JournalThis is a journal entry, dealing with my own experiences, feelings and thoughts. Click here for psychotherapy theory, or here to find more about me. — To practice silence and be comfortable with it, I need to get to know it. I got interested in silence as a counselling skill. And I quickly realised it’s…
To second life
in JournalThis is a journal entry, dealing with my own experiences, feelings and thoughts. Click here for psychotherapy theory, or here to find more about me. – There is no question I have passed a clearly marked transition to a second stage of adulthood. While women have the universal sign of menopause, men traditionally rely on “exit events”…