My interview with UEL and being a weed

I have been busy the last six months. Training to become a counsellor, learning design, making money, thinking how to make more, being a parent, looking after myself and continuing my path of self-development. It’s been a good busy.

Part of the hard work has been about getting myself in a position where I can start a Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling in 2025.

One of the things that you learn when you decide to become a counsellor, it’s that counselling training is unlike every other training. It’s all-encompassing, permeating every corner of your life. It’s not just about theory and skills, but also about deepening your self-discovery, dealing with your own neurosis, revealing your own blinkered spots and dealing with your own emotional blocks.

When I started my training, I quickly learned what the ideal training path would be – starting a PGDip in 2025. Which meant the more motivated I felt about this career change, the more fear I observed about having my plans failing.

The thing is that PGDips in Counselling are competitive. There is a big chance no University programme will take me in 2025. It’s boring to talk about what that would mean, but it’s essentially bad.

For a while, this was a source of anxiety. It felt like a familiar lose-lose situation. If I don’t get into Uni, it will be terrible. And if I do, I’ll quickly assume that was just normal and expected.

Hence, tuning into the 24/7 counselling training way of thinking has made me feel less anxious, because it allowed me to take more control and escape the trap of visible success. It’s not that I don’t care if I make it to Postgraduate next year, it’s that I realise that studies are only a small part of what it takes to become a counsellor.

Now that I see counselling training as a life, always-on endeavour, I have decided that my marketing contract will be the last one because it’s not helping me to become a better counsellor in any way.

Instead, I will change careers and become a social worker – because that will help me become a better counsellor and because it already angles at my life’s purpose of helping people understand themselves better and lead better lives.

However, I had a little excitement to see UEL wanted to interview me on the back of my application.

And I totally loved what they asked me to prepare – a metaphor about myself.

Well, it turns out I am the sort of person who thinks in metaphors, and I had already considered a good one for me. I never had the inclination to explore it and write it down, so I welcomed the opportunity to do it.

I am weed and this is how.

I grew up misunderstood and resented by my gardeners, who hacked at my leaves, scorched my stems and finally – uprooted me and put me in the compost.

As a result and/or in spite of this, I developed as an intelligent, creative, resourceful, resilient, curious, strategic innovator with a DIY ethos and a ability to thrive in chaos and abandoned terrains.

Yes, it’s true there are more demanding parts within me. They like to achieve, to conquer, to take over and dominate. They’re scared about losing power and need to be attended to so they relax and not get us all in trouble, or make us too visible.

But as I evolve and scatter my seeds I realise that growth can be intentional and compassionate. And that I can embody many positive attributes naturally – I’m connected, collaborative with others around me, giving to the soil, health-promoting, calm and clear minded about my purpose.

Ok, sometimes I can be a bit prickly, but it’s to protect what matters and out of love.

Ultimately, I am wild: authentic, courageous, function over form, independent and self-accepting. I challenge norms constructively for the greater good.

I am learning what I am, but I know I am quite like a weed and I love that.